Assertiveness is a way of communicating with others in respectful and Direct ways. This means being clear and concise in the language we use, but not just with our words: with our body language as well.

Remember most messages come from body language. Around 90% of communication is actually non-verbal, it is in how We stand; our posture, how we look or gaze, and how we position ourselves in relation to the person we are conversing with.

Being assertive means advocating for your own rights and needs but without dominating or overpowering the needs of others. Someone who is assertive will have respect for themselves and others and will value what is said.

Being assertive is important for a person in order to express your feelings or to get needs met. Assertiveness can help raise self-esteem and self respect as well as change the narrative for the treatment you receive.

However many people who have experienced abuse or trauma in childhood are not able to assert themselves adequately. Instead we may come across as passive or aggressive during perceived confrontation. As a result a person can have difficulty communicating their needs and wants. People who are passive in their communication style and people who are aggressive in their communication style will struggle to voice what needs they have. This can result in situational stress amongst negative feelings such as; anger, resentment, isolation and loneliness.

The key to the gaining our lives back as victims of trauma is in asserting ourselves adequately in any conversation or situation we have. Being assertive means that relationships have natural boundaries and it is less likely that these boundaries will be crossed.
Currently we are conducting research into the causes of trauma. I have included a link to the survey here :

If you would be interested in taking part, please feel free. If you would like to share this study i would also welcome you to use the link, many thanks!